So I'm back on the blog again after a sort break in sunny Scotland, not taking the piss! it was lovely and sunny; terrible cold wind but OK in shelter. Met up with some old friends and all their family, a special sort of re-union cos he's not well. I think he saw this as a last get together and wanted to pay for everything, this is not the townies way even old farts insist on paying their way!
So I dreamt up this jolly wheeze and said "Look, on the 18th (April) I will have been retired exactly 18 years and 18 days and would like to buy the dinner that night" So thinking this an amazing co-incidence they all agreed; not a one realised that on the 19th next year it will, of course, be 19 yrs and 19 days !!!
We did a bit of walking, but one day it was a bit too steep for me so I said "I'll meet you back in that Belhaven pub we passed, I want to renew my aquaintance with Belhaven Bill" (this a ref. to the only other time I'd been to Scotland and had collected beer mats in the shape of a sailor i.e Belhaven Bill-I think they are still in a box over in the little house!).
I walked into the pub and up to the only real ale pump on the bar to see that it was labled " London Pride, brewed by Fullers in Chiswick" I was born in Shepherds Bush, which is next door to Chiswick !!!!
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
Wednesday, April 9, 2008
Demonstrations
As in London there have demonstrations around the Olympic flame in Paris and given that the first parade of the flame was organised by hitler to legitimise the 1936 Games it seems quite appropriate that the chinese would do the same! BUT they have over-shadowed others here in France; the new government, set up by a new President committed to social and finacial reforms, are beginning to announce their spending plans. Or rather cutting plans! Committed to reducing Public Spending they have announced their education plan, which reduces the number of country schools and generally reduces the number of classes and therefore the teachers as well as increasing class size. The whole world is on the march and blockading schools, teachers, parents and students all involved, this closely following protests against the closure of local post offices.
Down on the coast there's trouble too, the government is reducing the number of life-guards by 9000 staff, this wont cause redundancies as they are generally part of the Gendarmery, which in itself is a brigade of the army; they will be redeployed. Seaside towns are seething about beach safety and threatening to close beaches off peak.
There are also cuts in the health service, one of which is that the state national health service no longer fund services related to circulatory problems like say varicose veins. On this one I think the government is on a winner; by the very nature of their complaint it seems unlikely that they will be making protest marches !
Down on the coast there's trouble too, the government is reducing the number of life-guards by 9000 staff, this wont cause redundancies as they are generally part of the Gendarmery, which in itself is a brigade of the army; they will be redeployed. Seaside towns are seething about beach safety and threatening to close beaches off peak.
There are also cuts in the health service, one of which is that the state national health service no longer fund services related to circulatory problems like say varicose veins. On this one I think the government is on a winner; by the very nature of their complaint it seems unlikely that they will be making protest marches !
Wednesday, April 2, 2008
The Battle of the Pharmacies
There's an English comedian who starts his act by shouting "Where would we be if we didn't have ANY rules?" and the audience shouts back "FRANCE!" Nothing could be further from the truth; even the location and number of the corner chemists shop is regulated.
National regulations stipulate that there can be one chemists shop for every 5,000 people and a regional tribunal sits to determine any variations to the population in relation to the number of shops. Recently a village on the other side of Tarbes (our departmental town) applied for and got permission to build a new chemists. An appeal by a chemist in another village went to the tribunal, who re-did their calculations and found they had been mistaken, so they ordered the new chemists to close and close it did! It is of course possible that the tribunal is made up of existing chemists!!!! This is France after all!
I've heard it said that the richest person in a country town is the chemist not the doctor nor the notaire nor local businessmen and I have never seen a tatty chemist shop they always look as though they were re-furbished last week. Under the 5000 rule our canton qualifies for and has 2 chemist shops. One for the 5000 who live in the town and the other for the 5000 in the dozen or so villages spread around it; both are located in the town.
One shop is in centre ville the other is located on the edge of town but right next door to the Doctors group practice, this meant that practically everybody had to pass the second shop with their prescription hot off the printer clutched in their hand. Madame Mathise had also had the presence of mind (or eye for a business oppotunity) to splash out on a piece of land which she made into an off street car park next to her and the Docs. All was going very well for her until the Doctors moved into a new purpose built heath centre on the other side of town; this meant that about 75% of the population had to make a detour IF they were to visit her shop!
All was going very well for Monsieur Duval in the centre ville shop (as you can imagine!). He aquired the shop next door and expanded into it, this must have been an expensive move as his origional shop had very ornate stonework round the doors and windows and this had to be replicated. A comprehensive internal re-furb including new and additional computer stations took place and he even got in an english teacher to teach all his girls "chemists english", to corner that market.
The battle had swung his way (but not for long!) and it's begining to resemble the battle for market share between the big supermarket chains in the UK !!
I (being English I suppose) had always stayed loyal to Madame (except,that is, for Tick Treatment which is vastly more expensive at her place than chez Duval). I have to drive past her place on my way in and out of town so I suppose that makes loyalty relatively easy.
On my way to the Doctors for my 3 month check-up last week I was surprised to see her shop had closed and as I got near to the surgery saw that in a cunning midnight swoop she had relocated to a different shop only 50 yards from the Docs. This seems to have been done in secret, I visit her shop at least monthly and none of her girls had even hinted they might be moving!
Earlier I mentioned computer stations, this is because chemist shops here have them instead of counters. The health system works on a plastic card with a micro chip which is read by these computers
National regulations stipulate that there can be one chemists shop for every 5,000 people and a regional tribunal sits to determine any variations to the population in relation to the number of shops. Recently a village on the other side of Tarbes (our departmental town) applied for and got permission to build a new chemists. An appeal by a chemist in another village went to the tribunal, who re-did their calculations and found they had been mistaken, so they ordered the new chemists to close and close it did! It is of course possible that the tribunal is made up of existing chemists!!!! This is France after all!
I've heard it said that the richest person in a country town is the chemist not the doctor nor the notaire nor local businessmen and I have never seen a tatty chemist shop they always look as though they were re-furbished last week. Under the 5000 rule our canton qualifies for and has 2 chemist shops. One for the 5000 who live in the town and the other for the 5000 in the dozen or so villages spread around it; both are located in the town.
One shop is in centre ville the other is located on the edge of town but right next door to the Doctors group practice, this meant that practically everybody had to pass the second shop with their prescription hot off the printer clutched in their hand. Madame Mathise had also had the presence of mind (or eye for a business oppotunity) to splash out on a piece of land which she made into an off street car park next to her and the Docs. All was going very well for her until the Doctors moved into a new purpose built heath centre on the other side of town; this meant that about 75% of the population had to make a detour IF they were to visit her shop!
All was going very well for Monsieur Duval in the centre ville shop (as you can imagine!). He aquired the shop next door and expanded into it, this must have been an expensive move as his origional shop had very ornate stonework round the doors and windows and this had to be replicated. A comprehensive internal re-furb including new and additional computer stations took place and he even got in an english teacher to teach all his girls "chemists english", to corner that market.
The battle had swung his way (but not for long!) and it's begining to resemble the battle for market share between the big supermarket chains in the UK !!
I (being English I suppose) had always stayed loyal to Madame (except,that is, for Tick Treatment which is vastly more expensive at her place than chez Duval). I have to drive past her place on my way in and out of town so I suppose that makes loyalty relatively easy.
On my way to the Doctors for my 3 month check-up last week I was surprised to see her shop had closed and as I got near to the surgery saw that in a cunning midnight swoop she had relocated to a different shop only 50 yards from the Docs. This seems to have been done in secret, I visit her shop at least monthly and none of her girls had even hinted they might be moving!
Earlier I mentioned computer stations, this is because chemist shops here have them instead of counters. The health system works on a plastic card with a micro chip which is read by these computers
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
Muddy La Feet
Last week I introduced Madame Muddy laying into the cattle, this week it's his turn. He's short and stocky,with a ruddy weather-beaten face under a black beret. Everybodies idea of a typical French peasant (not an insulting or derogatory word here; a badge they wear with pride!). Although in his 80s he's only semi retired and seems to spend most of his time standing on the footplate of a tractor driven by Son of Muddy, that's when he's not working on his kitchen garden.
Work on this has been halted by a sudden burst of snow over Easter. There is a local saying which roughly translates as " Xmas on the terrace means Easter round the fire". Proof this year that we've had to pay a price for all the "aperos" we've taken under the winter sun on the back terrace!
I used to think that Muddy with his years of outdoor experience would be very knowledgeable about local weather conditions and used to consult him whenever I saw him. I bought a TV as an aid to learning more French and over a period I began to realise that Muddy was merely repeating the local forecast from the night befores TV.
The first time it snowed here, I asked him did we always get snow in the winter and he said "No! only every 10 years". It snowed again the following year and I spoke with him again and again he said "only every 10 years". I said "You said that last year when it snowed" He said "Ah! but this is the next 10 years"
There haven't been any weekly bulletins for a while but I'm still making slow progress with the weight loss. Monday I was 88.4 kilos up from 88.0 the previous week, no surprise as I ate and drank well over the Easter period. Helped in no little way by the fact the hypermarket had a wine sale that week !! Still no real progress on cutting down on the wine consumption.
Monday, March 17, 2008
All Hands to the Plough
A real burst of early summer at the end of last week,sun and temperatures in the 20s,just right for the start of the ploughing season. They usually get this done in time to start planting the first of the Maize (corn on the cob) at Easter.
The sound of a tractor, quite close, caught my attention and I could see the dog, that connoisseur of all things fecal, standing quivering with excitement in the doorway. Looking out I saw that it was Muddy, our farmer neighbour, muck spreading, on the bit of ground across the lane, that he uses as a sort of kitchen garden. As I stood there he emerged from a great shower of shit with a grin and a cheery wave.
We call him Muddy partly because his farmyard is always a morass of deep slimy black mud but mostly because his name is "Lafitte" ( La Feet); thus Muddy La Feet! Not original, from the Pink Panther I think!
He spends a disproportionate amount of time on the kitchen garden, not I think because of choice but because of the awkward site. It's only about the size of 2 tennis courts and bounded on all sides by barns and fences. He has no hope of getting a modern rigid pole plough onto it and seems to have an interesting collection of 1950s machinery that he uses on it. Even with these he has no room to turn the tractor and has to reverse to start every pass but even so he's currently leaving a generous coating of muck everywhere. The back of his barn is well spread as is the road; hence the dogs excitement as that's the way we walk some evenings!
Some of the kitchen garden is used for veg. but in the main it's planted with maize, for his wifes chickens I think. She's a wonderfull old lady about 4ft. 2ins in her high heels and weighing, at most, 5stone. I occaisionally 'phone her when their cows have escaped and she rushes out, armed with a stick as big as herself, and really lays into them. They are back in the field in no time and these are terrifyingly huge animals with horns like those Texas Longhorns one sees in the cowboy films.
The sound of a tractor, quite close, caught my attention and I could see the dog, that connoisseur of all things fecal, standing quivering with excitement in the doorway. Looking out I saw that it was Muddy, our farmer neighbour, muck spreading, on the bit of ground across the lane, that he uses as a sort of kitchen garden. As I stood there he emerged from a great shower of shit with a grin and a cheery wave.
We call him Muddy partly because his farmyard is always a morass of deep slimy black mud but mostly because his name is "Lafitte" ( La Feet); thus Muddy La Feet! Not original, from the Pink Panther I think!
He spends a disproportionate amount of time on the kitchen garden, not I think because of choice but because of the awkward site. It's only about the size of 2 tennis courts and bounded on all sides by barns and fences. He has no hope of getting a modern rigid pole plough onto it and seems to have an interesting collection of 1950s machinery that he uses on it. Even with these he has no room to turn the tractor and has to reverse to start every pass but even so he's currently leaving a generous coating of muck everywhere. The back of his barn is well spread as is the road; hence the dogs excitement as that's the way we walk some evenings!
Some of the kitchen garden is used for veg. but in the main it's planted with maize, for his wifes chickens I think. She's a wonderfull old lady about 4ft. 2ins in her high heels and weighing, at most, 5stone. I occaisionally 'phone her when their cows have escaped and she rushes out, armed with a stick as big as herself, and really lays into them. They are back in the field in no time and these are terrifyingly huge animals with horns like those Texas Longhorns one sees in the cowboy films.
Monday, March 10, 2008
Fat Old Fart (weekly bulletin)
89.2, That's a real surprise! Given that 5 out of the last 6 nights have been football nights on the T V and I was unable to resist opening a second bottle on most nights!
That makes it 6.5 Kilos I've lost since I started and that's a stone in avoirdupois (which is the English weight system) and would be a real target to most dieters. Friday I had my routine 3 monthly check-up at the doctors and having lost weight fully expected that my blood pressure would be lower, but no it was higher than normal!
Our little town, down in the valley, lies on one of the main routes for holiday makers heading for the mountains. Traditionaly the winter mid term holiday is two weeks long and is the main skying holiday for the French. In recent years this holiday has been staggered over a 4 week period to reduce the amount of traffic and hopefully the number of accidents. This being France the two regions that access the Pyrenees rather than the Alps for their skiing are carefully staggered so that the full brunt of our region coming home meets the full brunt of the region to the north going on holiday. Whether there is any reduction in accidents is a moot point but it does mean that our little town is mobbed out for 4 consecutive Saturdays. Being 2 hours from the heart of the mountains it's an ideal place to stop for lunch and the restraunters cram in every table they possibly can. This very much interfeers with my regular Saturday drink in Regis Bar so I was pleased to note this morning, the Monday after the end of the holidays, that there had been the first fall of fresh snow since January and the skiers had missed it!!!!
That makes it 6.5 Kilos I've lost since I started and that's a stone in avoirdupois (which is the English weight system) and would be a real target to most dieters. Friday I had my routine 3 monthly check-up at the doctors and having lost weight fully expected that my blood pressure would be lower, but no it was higher than normal!
Our little town, down in the valley, lies on one of the main routes for holiday makers heading for the mountains. Traditionaly the winter mid term holiday is two weeks long and is the main skying holiday for the French. In recent years this holiday has been staggered over a 4 week period to reduce the amount of traffic and hopefully the number of accidents. This being France the two regions that access the Pyrenees rather than the Alps for their skiing are carefully staggered so that the full brunt of our region coming home meets the full brunt of the region to the north going on holiday. Whether there is any reduction in accidents is a moot point but it does mean that our little town is mobbed out for 4 consecutive Saturdays. Being 2 hours from the heart of the mountains it's an ideal place to stop for lunch and the restraunters cram in every table they possibly can. This very much interfeers with my regular Saturday drink in Regis Bar so I was pleased to note this morning, the Monday after the end of the holidays, that there had been the first fall of fresh snow since January and the skiers had missed it!!!!
Wednesday, March 5, 2008
Fat Old Fart (weekly bulletin)
89.5 ! What a great result, under 90 kilos for the first time in years. For the first week I managed to reduce my alcohol intake on 4days, albeit by only 25% but combined with not eating in a restaurant it seems to have worked. The other 3 days I was the same loveable, old, greedy, self indulgent,week willed piss head!
I met another dog walker this morning, with a mad eyed,hyper active dog. I said "bonjour" and although French she replied in English. I find it so annoying that they recognise that I'm not French with just one word and switch to English when I'm trying desperately to learn French. It even happens on those rare occasions when the grandchildren drag me into MacDonald's, this slow grin spreads across their pimply adolescent faces and they say "Eat here or take-away!"
I think the instant recognition is due to the different pronunciation, French people seem to say "Bon jaw" with equal weight and length on the 2 syllables where we brits.must say "bon joooor". It is just so frustating.
No matter how I try I just can't seem to get to grips with this language. I've tried 3 or 4 recorded courses over the years and have also been on a language course over in Lourdes. Most of the other students were nuns, mainly Spanish speakers and although I ended up with a nice ornate certificate the course leader spoke Parisian type French. Although this is generally understood in this remote corner it's not a lot of help to me in trying to understand the local patois which sprinkles any conversation here.
I know the only way to learn is the "in at the deep end method!" and this time last year was a regular visitor to two French families. In both cases despite my entreaties to "pass by the house" neither reciprocated the visits. I used to pop into pass by both their houses at early lunch time, usually in time for a quick apero but the first familly said that time was a bit inconvienient why didn't I pass by the house at 5 o'clock or so. I didn't take up that suggestion as I've usually had a good drink at lunch time and don't like to drive in those circumstances. i'm my own worst enemy
I met another dog walker this morning, with a mad eyed,hyper active dog. I said "bonjour" and although French she replied in English. I find it so annoying that they recognise that I'm not French with just one word and switch to English when I'm trying desperately to learn French. It even happens on those rare occasions when the grandchildren drag me into MacDonald's, this slow grin spreads across their pimply adolescent faces and they say "Eat here or take-away!"
I think the instant recognition is due to the different pronunciation, French people seem to say "Bon jaw" with equal weight and length on the 2 syllables where we brits.must say "bon joooor". It is just so frustating.
No matter how I try I just can't seem to get to grips with this language. I've tried 3 or 4 recorded courses over the years and have also been on a language course over in Lourdes. Most of the other students were nuns, mainly Spanish speakers and although I ended up with a nice ornate certificate the course leader spoke Parisian type French. Although this is generally understood in this remote corner it's not a lot of help to me in trying to understand the local patois which sprinkles any conversation here.
I know the only way to learn is the "in at the deep end method!" and this time last year was a regular visitor to two French families. In both cases despite my entreaties to "pass by the house" neither reciprocated the visits. I used to pop into pass by both their houses at early lunch time, usually in time for a quick apero but the first familly said that time was a bit inconvienient why didn't I pass by the house at 5 o'clock or so. I didn't take up that suggestion as I've usually had a good drink at lunch time and don't like to drive in those circumstances. i'm my own worst enemy
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